Welcome to the bb forum and thank you for sharing your story. I’m glad you found us, too!
It must be terribly difficult to live with chronic illness and pain, never mind severe anxiety. I’m really very sorry for your struggles.
I have some understanding of your situation, having spent months in chronic pain recovering from serious injury twice in my life. However, I realise it was different as I had recovery goals, which I eventually achieved.
What I do remember though is being very lonely and constantly feeling isolated during those periods of time. There was no internet or social media back then, so I relied on family and friends for connection. It was tough.
Hopefully this community will be a place where you can give and receive support and find a sense of belonging.
Kind thoughts to you