I can really identify with the intensity of the physical feelings you can experience as a part of anxiety. It can feel very frightening when your body acts in this way. I sometimes feel like my body is 'betraying' me somehow. So, don't feel ashamed about needing support when things feel out of control - that's what it's there for. In the long-term you will develop more coping skills and strategies to reduce the frequency of attacks and lessen their intensity. The other important skill or attitude is one of acceptance and self-compassion. It really is tough when we have these feelings, especially if we don't have the social support we're looking for. I'm still on a journey of 'radical self-acceptance', which means tolerating the peaks and troughs of my feelings even when I wouldn't choose them.
I have received lots of good re-framing advice on my travels, and one of the most profound was the idea that when I feel bereft or anxious (for whatever reason) that on one level this reflects the fact that I am 'full of feeling'. Now, normally, deep sadness and anxiety are not feelings I welcome, but re-framed this way they simply become members of a family of feelings that are part and parcel of being human. That's in fact what we are, we are feeling beings. This re-framing has helped me understand that my pattern of feeling suppression has been harmful to my fullest sense of self. In other words it's completely normal to have all sorts of feelings and we needn't deny any of them.
A particular insight for me is the connection between repressing sadness and feeling anxious. Often lying beneath my anxiety is a need for expressing vulnerability and feeling safe. This is what I am now working on, to reconnect with those core feelings. I'm working with a new psychologist to 'go beneath the bonnet' and explore why hiding sadness has been so important in my life. It's another chapter on the journey toward an easier sense of being all of myself. I will undoubtedly be challenged by more feelings of anxiety and deep sadness, but I will choose to be courageous and work for positive changes in managing my internal world and forging my place in the world. We all have something unique to give, you and me too!