Hi Anto77, welcome!
Yes, those competent folk can definitely make things look easy. In the area of work, the associations we make don't necessarily stop with simply meeting or coming to know people:
- When we meet our boss, straight away we may associate with our role as 'subordinate'
- When we interact with a client (in disability, aged care etc), we may associate with our role as 'carer'
Yet, when we interact with confident and capable people in our workplace, things aren't necessarily so clear cut. It can go one of 2 ways
- We can associate with our role as 'someone who is gradually learning what others have come to know well over time'
- We can associate with comparisons. I am slower than him/her. I make more mistakes than him/her. I have less confidence than him/her and so on. Boy, how the list can go on, if we're doing the comparison thing
Myself, I worked with adults with intellectual challenges before I took time off to raise kids. Now, 16 years later, I'm back in the workforce, working in aged care (also very rewarding). I've been there a year this month. The 1st 8 months or so were like hell when it came to my identity: I am so slow, I am hopeless, I am someone who's never going to get this. The people I work with must think I am stupid. Yes, hell! Working with an incredibly supportive staff meant I was surrounded by guidance, patience, encouragement and so much more. They helped me reach the truth: I am valuable, I am one of them, I am capable etc. At about that 8 month mark everything just clicked. My brain had been learning a program specific to the role I was working in. It's amazing how when people I work with come back from leave they typically say 'I can't believe how many things I've done wrong today!' They can laugh about it because they know they are competent but their 'auto-pilot' program hasn't quite switched on yet. By the way, that program works with tasks. It's not related to the unique care we give to people.
I'm sure you're familiar with that auto-pilot program that's served you well in previous jobs. You'll know that in order for it to work effectively, the brain has to go through a programming stage, that stage you're facing now. When it's completed it's installation you will feel it.
If we focus on the benefits of our sensitive nature (what a kind, thoughtful and giving person we are) we are identifying with an undeniable truth (a positive rewarding identity). The rest can be a deeply challenging learning process.