Thank you for your post. I can appreciate the frustration of feeling the need to check something that you know is OK. While I have not been in this situation I can imagine how distressing this can be.
I feel disappointed for you that your mental health professionals will not take this seriously. While you do need to manage your bipolar diagnosis there is also the need to manage this additional stress. I would think the stress of managing, or not managing, your OCD must impinge on your management of the bipolar disorder. Your MH professionals probably do take your OCD seriously but feel there is a greater priority. However, you are the person concerned in this and you need to have your concerns listened to and addressed.
I can see why your son is getting irritated and this places another level of stress on you. This also needs to be addressed with your psychiatrist. When we are tired or a little unwell those things we usually manage have the potential to assume huge proportions which is when your OCD kicks in more strongly. In the end it gets to be an horrendous circle of events.
I hesitate to suggest anything that may add to your need to check everything. However, I am wondering if it would help if you made a list of all these behaviours, their frequency and the effect they have on your life/health and on your relationship with your son. These are important factors as they have such a huge impact on your life. If your psychiatrist could see the impact all this is having on you then he/she may be more willing to work with you on this. You could ask if it would be better to go to someone else to talk about the OCD stuff. Without wishing to denigrate your psychiatrist in any way it's been my observation that often they have their areas of expertise and can be reluctant to move into a different arena. This is not to call their expertise into question, just possibly their priorities.
The next time you see your psychiatrist can you state you want to spend the whole session discussing your OCD difficulties. As a patient you do have the right to choose the topic of discussion.
I hope this has been helpful to you. Love to hear from you again.