Welcome to the forums, thank you for reaching out! the forums are a safe and non-judgemental place!
is this something to do with OCD, is it some sort of
depression, will these feelings for her return because all i want to do
is love her like i used too. Hope this made sense
- Based on my experience, I believe you are spot on, more than likely something to do with your OCD. What kind of OCD if you don't mind me asking?
I have harm OCD - basically i obsess over the fear of hurting myself and others - including my partner. These images/feelings are so disturbing and distressing to me, I obsess over them even though I know i would never hurt myself, my partner or other people in a million years. What i've been learning (with the help of a psychologist) is that obsessing over the thoughts (no matter how distressing they are) just feeds the OCD. The OCD gets stronger.
The trick? Dont feed it! acknowledge the thought/feeling and let go of it! Its very hard work but I'm just starting to get the hang of letting go and my OCD thoughts are weakening.
I encourage you to open up to your girlfriend - as hard as it is. I encourage you to see a psychologist to help you manage the OCD.
As I said, its hard work but if you keep doing the work I believe it becomes very manageable.
All the best! please let us know how you go if you feel comfortable.