So my first relationship ended about 5 years ago when I was 19. Ever since then I've been getting "triggered" by anything that reminds me of my ex. Anything from a car the same colour, the same place we've been to together, any memory (physical or mental) causes pain in my chest and twists my stomach.
I haven't seen him since we broke up five years ago, haven't had any communication at all. I just keep replaying everything in my head and living in the past.
Only ever been in one other relationship since and that has also ended (amicably too), but I'm feeling so stressed about feeling worthy for a life partner.
Does anyone else have experience with this kind of obsessive, self-destructive thought pattern? How do you try to surrender the same thing (s) ever day? I always feel like I've moved on and then I'll get triggered again..
Thinking out loud..might not make sense