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by Soberlicious96
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Topic: Sense of Impending Doom

  1. DominiqueM
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    10 May 2019 in reply to Guest8901

    Oh I totally understand & you have my support. Sometimes just knowing there are other people with the same thing can be a relief.

    I had the first one after a successful week of gigs in Tamworth, it was the night before we were leaving and I couldn’t let myself fall asleep because I was absolutely convinced I would die. I knew intellectually that I wouldn’t but my emotions overwhelmed my intellect. I didn’t sleep for 2 days, by then I had calmed down but I had no idea what had happened. I’d had panic attacks before but this was something else. it was a while before another then a little shorter time until I’ve had 4 in the last couple of weeks.

    With my therapist, gp & shrink, yes I’ve got them all, I’m managing using some medication (I have other mental health issues so we’ve got be careful not to make them worse) I do breathing exercises, I thought it was ridiculous but I was wrong it really does help & I do guided 10 minute meditation on YouTube again I thought it couldn’t work but it really helps me. It takes the focus away. A couple of times I’ve done 3-4 in a row to stop me crawling the walls.

    So far so good. Maybe some of these could help. I really hope you find the answer.

    2 people found this helpful
  2. Birdy77
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    10 May 2019 in reply to DominiqueM
    Hello Everyone,

    Just a short post to say thank you for all your support.

    Dominique, welcome to the forums, it is so good you've come here and thank you for posting. I am so glad you've got your strategies that help you and support you. I agree, things that you initially think "pfft, that's not going to work!" sometimes turn out to be the best at bringing us back to ourselves and back to a calm equilibrium. I hope you are able to bring yourself back after your 4 attacks lately. There is a great thread here about Grounding Yourself in the Staying Well section, lots of diverse strategies, you might be interested in browsing through. You are welcome here any time.

    John and Moon, thank you both also for your thoughts. I totally understand what you both are saying and I agree. I have a problem whereby when I'm feeling depressed, i withdraw - i avoid people, retreat into myself ... so then when i come around to an anxious cycle, or i feel the build up towards this old friend of mine, Impending Doom, I find myself at a bit of a loss, because here I am, having retreated into solitude and it makes it hard because my connections are out of reach.

    Well that's what I (or my inner demons) tell me, but it's not really true, because they're just a phone call away or whatever ... but it's a bit of a vicious cycle. Does that make sense?

    Thank you so, so much Grandy, Deebs and Pepper for your loving support, I will reply to you soon, your support and care is so very deeply appreciated. Love ❤

    🌻birdy
    3 people found this helpful
  3. Croix
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    12 May 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Dear 🌻Birdy~

    Well it may be a familiar cycle, but withdrawing is is only in you, we are still here. Whether we talk or not we are here, and here we stay, reachable with a few keystrokes.

    Croix

    3 people found this helpful
  4. CMF
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    12 May 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Dear Birdy

    I've been reading bits and pieces of your thread and keep having moments of 'omg, yes, i get it". I understand exactly what it's like.

    I hear you and understand my friend.

    Cmf x

    4 people found this helpful
  5. John Pint
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    17 May 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Hello Birdy.

    disconnecting from people is probably the most common result of depression and anxiety! think about it- when you are depressed and anxious- you are vulnerable- We know people can hurt us- so we protect ourselves, but people can also enrich our lives....BUT, the RIGHT people we trust can enrich our lives.

    I believe it all goes back to our primal instinct of evolution over thousands of years....If we were in danger in the wild, we would hide and hibernate in our caves, being very cautious of any dangers out in the wild-bears-animals etc.....-feeling anxious.....But when there are no predators or anything that can hurt us around, we can express ourselves and be more vulnerable without consequences of being hurt. Some people in the tribe would be better at identifying risks to the tribe (people with better instincts of what can go wrong-people more better at identifying threats) In today's society, these people possibly are succeptable to depression and anxiety more.

    2 people found this helpful
  6. Ggrand
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    17 May 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Hello Dear 🌻Birdy and everyone..

    Theres no need to reply to me sweety..please concerntrate on getting our beautiful, caring, loving, sweety Tweety Birdy as well as you can...please.That means more to me then a reply🌻💜..

    Birdy..it’s okay if you feel the need to retreat..im thinking and wanted to say to please if you need to talk..remember your beautiful friends here who want to help you as much as we can...we are here to listen and talk to you as much as you need sweety....

    As our warm and caring Mr Sir Croix has mentioned..we are not far away at all...just a few keyboard 🎹....oops not one....I meant the typing one...and a couple of push buttons away...

    Please be very gentle and kind to yourself lovely lady...Take some time out of your day to pamper yourself a little...it really does help dear sweet lady....Wish they were real hugs that you could really feel that I’m sending you..🤗🤗🤗..They are coming from my heart, just close your eyes and think of all your beautiful friends here and imagine a great big giant group hug from us all.....🤗🤗..

    Sending you my love and many hugs 💜🤗...dear 🌻Birdy..

    Grandy..👼..

    3 people found this helpful
  7. Peppermintbach
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    17 May 2019

    Dear friend/beautiful birdy (and a wave to all),

    Take all the time you need. There’s no need to respond to this post. I am just sending you my love and telling you that I care. It’s as simple as that. Whenever you’re ready or want to, many caring ears are here ;)

    Much love,

    Pepper xoxox

    2 people found this helpful
  8. demonblaster
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    18 May 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Hey tweety 🤗and other lovelies ☺

    Same no need for reply just sending my love and care too 💗

    Hope you're doing ok lovely 🤗

    2 people found this helpful
  9. startingnew
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    24 May 2019
    Thinking of you Birdy 💐💚
    3 people found this helpful
  10. Birdy77
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    29 May 2019 in reply to Croix
    Hello everyone,

    I have lots that I want to say to you each, but i feel all muddled up.

    Firstly, Sir Croix, you made me have a huge smile with your 🌻 that you gave me! Woah Nelly. Thank you.

    John, I really appreciated your interesting comments and thoughts about retreating into ourselves. I can see a lot of sense in what you wrote.

    Thank you Grandy, CMF, SN , precious Pepper and the Deebsta for your love and support, I am sorry my reply for now is crap.

    I just feel like a bad person at the moment. I am pushing friends away, or not bothering to call them back. I just want to go into my cocoon and be left alone with my sadness at the moment.

    If someone else said this to me, I would say "it is ok for you to feel this way" ... but what if something happens to these people? What if they need me? I am being selfish, but I can't seem to break it. I am happy texting people, and I send emails to keep everything going, but I am retreating from talking and seeing people face to face. I just dont want to (toddler behaviour, noted).

    I also have this big fear looming about parents and other estranged family members dying. I don't know how to handle it when it happens. Mrs b tells me we will cross that bridge when we come to it, and that's the only thing we can do, but I'm gripped with fear.

    Please don't feel like you need to reply to this post, I just needed to write something down, I feel like rubbish.

    Thank you for being here for me and for listening.

    🌻birdy
    2 people found this helpful
  11. Peppermintbach
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    29 May 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Our darling friend,

    I know you said we don’t need to reply. But I want to reply so I hope that’s okay with you...I just want to say that we are indeed listening and that we care very much about you.

    I know you’re currently curled up in your cocoon. I’m hoping it’s okay if I peer into that cocoon from time to time to see how you’re doing. Perhaps I’ll even pitch a tent tonight next to that protective cocoon layer of yours...just to give you a bit of company...

    I know you’re spiralling and scared. I know you must have so many anxious running through your head...we are here with you...sitting and listening...

    About losing loved ones, especially estranged family members, I understand that is a very big and real fear. As mrs b wisely said, you’ll cross that bridge when you get there...

    Maybe for now, I wonder if you could try to bring yourself back to the here and now. As in, when the spiral begins, perhaps grounding yourself will help...

    Maybe using your senses to engage with your present environment will help manage some of the anxiety...noticing the colours you see around you, the sounds you hear, the things you can touch, smell, etc...

    Here and now...gentle and easy does it....

    I understand you’re very much on edge. There’s no need to reply to this post. Just take good care of yourself. Warm hugs from me...

    You are loved here xoxox

    2 people found this helpful
  12. demonblaster
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    30 May 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Our beautiful Tweety 🐥 here darlin come to Aunty Deebsta for as long as you like a warm comforting loving hug 🤗 Feel my energy sweets

    Darling girl I so know that feeling of wanting to shut away from the world. Excellent you're ok texting and emailing. Theres no obligation to talk at any given time

    You dear love I also can relate to that fear of losing loved ones, it's so painful isn't it. Honey I wonder if it could ease your mind if in texts you tell these people you love them but unable to talk atm that you're in poor headspace and need time to realign.

    I'm glad it was at least bearable at the family outing but you had that looming stress building for a while and the intended by the sounds thoughtlessness. Some people are so caught up in their bubbles of ...ok I'll be a lady. Sadly their attitudes rub off bad vibes to those around them.

    Darls I was thinking about you last night and wondering if you like yourself because since I met you I always have which didnt take long to grow to love you. I too as our beautiful friend Peppy don't expect an answer so please love don't feel obliged I'm secure in our friendship that you're not icing me.

    You did so well getting anything on paper it's so hard to express when our minds shut down on us like this. I like you saying to people it's ok to feel this way. Agree. What I have found but then we're all different I realize is the many times I've let myself go with the flow there's a point it starts pretty quickly to sink me. At times I've set an invisible boundary line because the whole damned deals such hard bloody work isnt it. Just it's not impossible but harder to pull back up the lower we go.

    I too feel your loving Mrs Tweety is on the right track, sweety believe me I hear you. Honey when and if the time comes we do find our footing and time helps move us through. This could be another outlet for stress

    I'm so glad you managed to say how you're feeling. Hun to help you with at least fragmented relief which gives our heads a ewst from the turmoil, thinking about some good things happening like your renos, change can be very stimulating. Your love for gardening sounds like such a beautiful release for you being amongst the earth in the sun hearing fellow tweetys..cast your mind to the pleasure you derive from it and the beauty.

    You shine girl. Sending much love & pitching a tent on the other side of you.

    I picked a beautiful 🌿from your garden to remind you of good things. 🌴

    🤗

    2 people found this helpful
  13. demonblaster
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    30 May 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Darling Tweety 🤗

    Just lost my post and I feel as Peppy does absolutely want to be here for you darlin ☺

    I know you want space and quiet so I'm pitching my tent 2.3 cms away from yours. Sorry about the noise and cussing I haven't pitched one before and have no idea why they supply pegs...it's not as if we're going to hang the thing up to dry....🤔...scratching head... bbl honey

    Meanwhile sweety these can be pleasant even if temporary breaks with the pain.

    If you cast your mind to your gardening, picture yourself doing it.. feel the earth breathe in the smell, feel the sun and light around you, the warmth, birdies chat chatting with their magical voices, serenity ...your at one with nature and feeling full peace relaxation and warmth.

    Also dropping off one of Grandys chocolate wax candles to watch the flame and the video of me eating it 😲🤤😷

    Sending warmth love thoughts and silent healing 🤗

    You're beautiful tweety, never doubt yourself. The world needs more tweets 🐥🕊

    2 people found this helpful
  14. demonblaster
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    30 May 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Beautiful Tweety darling 🤗 hi everyone ☺

    I lost not one..oh no .. but two posts..yip .. so I'll bbl 😆

    In the mean time leaving outside your tent a gorgeous wax..take note.. not ...😆 choccy scented candle for you sweety ... when you look into the flame you get to 😂 while you watch my fame in the video that went viral that our gorgeous must have posted on the internet of me eating the choccy scented candle 🤣

    Catch ya soon our sweety tweety.

    Oh oh 😆 forgot to mention sorry about the cussing and noise but I'm giving you space.. all 2 cm and pitching a tent on the other side of you... for the life of me 🤔 can't figure out why they give us pegs...it's not like we're going to hang it up to dry... dah

    Love care 🗯 support.

    2 people found this helpful
  15. demonblaster
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    30 May 2019 in reply to demonblaster

    Cool bananas one of them came through.

    Doesn't at all look like my warbles are wobbly repeating repeating myself 😄

    Hope your day was lighter honey.

    Truth been thinking about you more than usual 🤗

    2 people found this helpful
  16. DominiqueM
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    15 July 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    If only there was a really good coping mechanism for the impending doom. I have had several attacks when I thought if I took a pill, and/or went to sleep, I would die. I didn't know what it was, why it was happening, my GP gave me something, so the minute I think I might go down that road, I take one and go straight sleep (well sometimes I sleep) other times I put a lighthearted show on tv to take my mind off the feeling that death is coming for me.

    I've also done 10 minute mindful meditations, using YouTube, there are heaps, and if I hadn't done it myself, I would never have believed how much they can help.

    I hope this is helpful info and that you find the peace we all need.

    Dominique

    4 people found this helpful
  17. quirkywords
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    15 July 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Birdy,

    t has been many weeks since you last posted so I am hoping you are feeling better.

    I have had thoughts about my loved ones especially if they are travelling.

    In your posts on the forum you always sound so confident and are very compassionate and understanding of others.

    I wonder if you can use that compassion on yourself.

    Quirky

    3 people found this helpful
  18. Peppermintbach
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    15 July 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Hi beautiful birdy (& a wave to all),

    Our darling friend, I have been thinking about you, so I thought that I just would drop in to leave a little message of comfort & love.

    I think it’s particularly lovely that you’ve had some recent visitors. Good of them (& everyone else) for supporting you :)

    Don’t worry, you don’t need to reply to me ;) This is me just reaching out to you “just because.”

    All I wanted to say was a very simple, we care about you. Very much. That is all.

    My love to you, mrs b and your boys,

    Pepper xoxox

    2 people found this helpful
  19. Birdy77
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    16 July 2019
    Hello everyone,

    Thanks all so much for your kind & lovely posts.

    Dominique, thanks for dropping by again, I know just how you feel with those thoughts that something is about to take-you-out. I've been having those thoughts occasionally when I wake in the night. Horrible. Thank goodness for meditations on Spotify etc.

    Quirky, thank you for your kind & caring thoughts, I am having lots of opportunities lately to practice compassion for myself! Including last night which was a disaster, including a broken plate on the kitchen floor, while both dogs vomited & then I burnt my hand cooking dinner. A perfect occasion for practicing self-compassion.

    Aunty Deebsta, you beautiful person. I loved all your posts, triple the awesomeness as they all ended up coming through. I loved your suggestion of taking myself in my mind to my garden & all the soothing things it does for me. Thank you so much for all the love & care & effort you put into your message(s!). Ta also for camping out with me & leaving 2.3cms of stretching space, the perfect amount.

    Pepper, thank you as always for your loving care, your gentle attention & true friendship which are all blessings. You are always welcome to peer into the cocoon.

    A bit if an update: generally speaking, I have been ok the last little bit. There are a few challenges going on with mrs b's (my partner's) family, which in a way, stops some of my tendency to create scenarios of doom, as there's sufficient drama actually happening in the Now.

    On the other hand, stress levels are a bit high & there are so many frustrating things going on.

    Amongst the frustration, I have feelings of anger & resentment, which are really difficult feelongs to deal with at the moment, particularly as one of the people who fuels my anger is currently on her deathbed.

    We (mrs b & i) have sacrificed a lot to assist her & the family in various ways - financially, with time & attention, dozens upon dozens of homecooked meals, sorting out legal things - & from her bed, she instructs us to hand money to her golden son who is the light of her life, but the thorn in everyone else's side, because he visits the hospital to tell her he's broke.

    It feels like such an insult to us & it feels like ingratitude, & I feel very angry about it. It's like because of her situation she feels anything she desires should be granted, her wish is everyone's command sort of thing. He has done nothing to help during this stressful time, not one single thing.

    Thanks for listening everyone.

    🌻birdy
    2 people found this helpful
  20. Peppermintbach
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    16 July 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Our darling friend (& a wave to all),

    Things sound very full-on at the moment. I feel your frustration, resentment, exhaustion and perhaps feelings of inner conflict (about mrs b’s mum). I hear you, my friend.

    I know you and your partner, mrs b, have gone above & beyond to help her mum & brother. They are both very fortunate to have both of your care & support. I really do believe that.

    But I sense & understand your resentment towards her entitlement, ungratefulness and her demanding ways. I feel maybe it’s a little like, the more you give, the more she expects & demands.

    Yet, it must be hard because you also realise her timee is limited. Hence the inner conflict/conflicting feelings...

    Sorry, I can’t help but wonder if maybe there’s a cultural element to the whole “golden son” situation. As you know, my heritage is eastern. I know that’s not the same as mrs b’s heritage, but please bear with me for sec as maybe what I’m about to say will resonate. Maybe?

    In a lot of eastern cultures (my heritage), sons are often preferred to daughters. For example, one of my male relatives is probably revered in a similar way to “golden boy” by his parents, especially his mum. She also has daughters.

    Her son rarely visits, doesn’t call on birthdays & basically makes zero effort with her. Her daughters, on the other hand, regularly visit, help her translate paperwork into English, show up on her birthdays, etc. Yet her son was always (& will forever be) her favourite, because of the whole cultural thing...

    Please don’t misunderstand me, I’m not saying that I support/agree with that worldview. But perhaps that could explain some of mrs b’s mum’s behaviour (even though I know she’s from a different cultural background to me, but sometimes there’s overlap). Just a little idea...perhaps it’s irrelevant, but I thought that I would mention it anyway.

    That said, I do understand me saying that doesn’t really necessarily help or lessens your anger or resentment (both of which is of course valid & understandable) ...I understand she is very demanding & difficult to be around. I get it...I really do...

    I hope you were able to practice self compassion last night. I feel for your poor dogs and I hope your hand heals soon. That sounds painful.

    Holding my hand out in friendship, thinking of you & your beautiful family (mrs b & your boys) and sending love & comfort.

    Love,

    Pepper xoxox

    2 people found this helpful
  21. Birdy77
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    16 July 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    Hello Pepper, my friend ❤

    Thank you for your thoughts.

    I agree, it's all originates probably as a cultural thing, which doesn't make it any easier for the "lesser than" of that particular culture (us). We are lesser than in a lot of ways. For a start, mrs b is female. Then, we're both female. Then, we've not provided her with a grandchild. All negatives in her books.

    Golden Boy has 2 children, neither of whom he can afford: he takes money from mrs b's parents - he has stolen from them (and they are on a pension). And now they are in considerable debt, which we (mrs b and i) are currently trying to consolidate.

    He can't afford nappies ... because he chooses to buy drugs instead.
    That is the crux of it - he would rather pay his dealer with money taken from the family, than buy nappies for his children.

    These are all things that mrs b's mother is fully aware of.

    You are spot on, with all of your cultural observations. There are some extra details that i could add and that i may be able to add in time.

    But it always does, and will always, feel unfair.

    🌻birdy
    2 people found this helpful
  22. Peppermintbach
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    16 July 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Our dear friend (& a wave to all),

    Yes, it is absolutely unfair. I feel your anger & frustration at the injustice of it all. I also feel your hurt and perhaps even feelings of rejection, because it hurts (a lot) to feel “lesser than.”

    I think it’s particularly painful to feel “lesser than” for things outside both your control. It’s also sad that no matter how much you try & give (& then give some more), it will never be enough in her eyes. Perhaps it’s as infuriating as it is painful...

    It’s clear that Golden Boy will always be no.1, no matter what he does or doesn’t do. That much has been spelled out to you...

    Golden Boy has clearly hurt a lot of people through his actions. He sounds like he might have a drug problem, but I can’t really say as I don’t know him personally...drug problem or not, I know he has hurt a lot of people (including you) and that makes me feel very sad...

    I know this doesn’t make things better, and doesn’t change the situation at all. But if it is comforting in the slightest, you are enough. To me, to us, you’re more than enough. To mrs b, you’re more than enough...

    We are listening, we care and we feel your anger & hurt. Yes, you’re right. it is unfair. If you need to let anything else out/share, we are sitting in your space of anger, hurt, resentment & inner conflict...we are here with you...

    Much love,

    Pepper xoxox

    2 people found this helpful
  23. Birdy77
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    26 July 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    Dear Everyone the following is a rant, which may not make sense, but i just want to get it off my chest. Thanks so much ❤

    Thank you so much Pepper my friend, for everything you said.

    Yes it does hurt, but it is also infuriating.

    The latest events had me fuming. I felt so much anger, it was hard to handle.

    Context: The parents are pensioners who have accumulated about 15K of debt. All due to paying for ridiculuous things & enabling their son by paying for nappies & other essentials that he "can't afford" because he spends his $ elsewhere. Debt we are trying to consolidate for them.

    Parents In Law both agreed they don't want fuss (with the funeral), minimal cost (due to no $ in the bank). So this is what mrs b has organised. Last night, MIL's friend calls the family together & says she knows of a low cost way to have a service with a payment plan "only costs $6k, pay it off month by month". So Father in Law & Sister in Law are all like, Yeah let's do that. And mrs b questioned, saying, "but we agreed to do the minimum one", & they attacked her saying "you don't want to honour your mother" etc. Keep in mind mrs b has given up close to 3 months wages to be with her family & help with everything, because we live away from them.

    I was so mad! Really struggling with my anger last night & this morning. They were saying we should go in to pay for the $6k thing, equal shares (of course Golden Boy doesn't have to do this, it's just the daughters).

    Then i remembered this conversation i had with my MIL a year or so ago where she was worried because she thought she couldn't afford her own funeral & i told her that in order to ease her worries, we would wipe all the money they owed us (approx $2K)& consider it a gift.

    I remembered this today, & reminded mrs b, & now we're taking the position that, we'll still contribute a third of what the minimal funeral thing would have cost (&that's on top of what we have given them in the past year, which is circa$2K), & that's it. I think that's fair.

    This was such a rant, & it probably doesn't make sense to anyone except me, but I'm going to post anyway because i know posting in the past has made me feel a bit better. Thanks so much.

    🌻birdy
    3 people found this helpful
  24. Ggrand
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    26 July 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Hello Birdy...

    Im pleased you posted and I really hope so much that by talking here..it has helped you even a little...I wish a lot though...

    I know sweety that it’s not the same as a real hug..if I was their with you I’d certainly be giving you one...So I’m sending you some instead..🤗🤗.with my love as well....💜💜..

    Please be gentle with you lovely lady....

    Grandy..

    3 people found this helpful
  25. Peppermintbach
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    26 July 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Hi darling friend (and a wave to all),

    We are listening and hearing you out. I know you’re feeling very angry, and you have every right to be. Rant away if it helps...we are here...

    Your Father in Law and Sister in law have clearly been pressuring mrs b/you with their demands. I think maybe the worst part is they seem to be using a bit of emotional blackmaail to try to get their way (e.g. “you don’t want to honour your mother”). That seems a little low to me, especially as I know mrs b has sacrificed a lot to help them/be with them...

    You stand your ground, my friend. I think your proposal sounds fair. I’m proud of you for taking a stand :)

    Listening and caring. Write/rant as as much as you feel you want to...we love and support you.

    Hugs and love,

    Pepper xoxox

    2 people found this helpful
  26. demonblaster
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    253 posts
    9 August 2019 in reply to Birdy77
    Beautiful tweety girl 🐥hi Peps ☘and all ☺

    Dear girl I've not been around for a while needed a break but care and love you sweety and have been quite concerned for you.
    I truly hope your days are brighter and beasties not niggling in your ear.
    Sweety just worry about the puddy tat not big nasty beasty IT's weak and you're not.

    😅 You're gorgeous thanks for loving all my posts. Yip the whole lot dumped in before 😄 and keep forgetting to thank you for your lovely comments about my post at that 😡other thread.

    Wow you sure did have aopportunities for self compassion back there. Breathe darling and only concentrate on that. How I try to keep it together in situations like that is not letting it beat me or get the better of me. Often its through my own doing so by not reacting to breaking dropping things we have calm. Often far from easy but some mental controls the key.

    Sounds like a really high stress sitch with mil. My heart goes out to you. Are you able to speak your mind or does it cause too much conflict. Poor girls it sux major.

    Totally agree with Peppy you really are enough, you're amazeballs tweets never forget that hun cause it's true.

    Well done venting out hun. I'd be fuming too. May I throw my 2 bob in that you girls stick to what you feel is right by youse. You both have been a big help to them without much thanks by the sounds. Don't let others guilt you both.

    Incidentally a friend that recently passed opted not to have a service which I'd imagines reduces cost.

    So tweety you've fascinated me with your now I can't think is it ceroc dancing. I have a v.good friend in NZ who dances I'll ask her about. Shes coming over in April with her kids. Staying 3 nights neaties.

    Lovey have you had a chance to be in your garden, your haven of peace and connection. Smell and feel the Earth darling feel the life in the soil and recapture memories of growth to ground you and give you peace in hard times ⚘🌱🍃

    Lot of time and love for you sweety. Smile at yourself honey and say I'm my own person I do what I believe is fair and right because I'm a good awesome person. ☺🤝🤗💗🐥🕊
    2 people found this helpful
  27. John Pint
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    13 August 2019 in reply to demonblaster

    Hello All.

    I enjoy looking and reading everyone's posts. It is really good that there is a support group on here where everyone leans on each other.

    A theory I have been pondering: I am dealing with a period of my life of high anxiety-I have for the past 3 years now....My symptoms are improving over the last few months....AND i have been reflecting on how this has happened......I believe it has to do with the following: I had no direction and was filled with past failures on all fronts. It is helping me that i am choosing a future path i want to follow and walking that path step by step. I have deviated at times-but that was always going to happen due to past habit conditioning. Also, setting down foundations which give me a sense of calm and escape where i can be myself has helped. This has enabled me daily to reflect on these wins with gratitude. You cant be anxious and grateful at the same time. I have also been starving my dark side and demons. On reflection we have 86400 seconds in a day- The more of this time we occupy with positive thought, the better we feel, so doesn't it make sense to search life with positive experiences, therefore positive memories and feelings. It will only be a matter of time until there are more seconds in a day where you have better thoughts.

    4 people found this helpful
  28. demonblaster
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    253 posts
    14 August 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Sweety Tweety 🐣 and everyone hiyaz ☺

    Darlin I know you're doing the hard yards lately and same as a mutual friend here if I understood correctly there's more going on.

    The emotions go into overdrive and every direction.

    You're a beautiful good person tweety remember that and don't let doubt and pain cloud it if you can help it.

    Anyway love just want you to know you're loved appreciated and to give you a big Aunty Awesome healing 🤗 for as long often & whenever you need darlin.

    Take your time huns here no pressure.

    Love ❤ 🤗 ☺ 🕊⚘

    John hi I've read some of your posts and spoken with you. Good to see you again ☺

    I like your thinking. Good on you and thanks for sharing which potentially can help many people.

    Go easy good peeps 🌱🕊

    2 people found this helpful
  29. Peppermintbach
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    138 posts
    14 August 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Hi dear friend (and a wave to all),

    I just felt like saying hello and leaving some big hugs (Aunty Deebs has the right idea), love and blessings...

    I know you have many things going on, which you may or may not wish to share. I understand sometimes you want to vent and chat, and other times that you have other ways of dealing with things...I support either, as long as it’s what you want...

    But just know, if you ever wish to unload (absolutely no pressure), maybe we maybe help shift that boulder just a tiny bit...a really tiny bit...it’s not much but we are here...our hearts are open to you is what I’m trying to say..

    You have a special place in our hearts. Thank you for being the beautiful person you are. Supersoul hugs coming right up. DB taught me well ;)

    Love,

    Pepper xoxox

    2 people found this helpful

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