I have struggled with this my whole life. I always knew someone would realise I am shit at what I am doing and kick me to the curb. I would often freeze, rabbit in the headlights style, terrified of doing anything lest it be the one thing that outs me as rubbish. The day I gave up full time employment to care for my disabled family as a single mum was a day of profound relief and I thought I could set aside this inexplicable lack of confidence and move on, happily ever after.
I didn't, It follows me to every activity and responsibility. I learned to drive at 46 and 6 years on I am still convinced someone will realise I just shouldnt be driving, will recognise my lack of skill, my anxiety, my danger to others. My partner, a rally driver in his youth, says I am a good, conservative, but good, driver.
I love to grow food, forage and cook from scratch. I enjoy making up my recipes and cooking by the seat of my pants, but I am constantly terrified of messing it up, poorly seasoning, serving too little/too much, convinced I have missed an ingredient or done something that has made it inedible. My partner, retired French Chef, loves my cooking and often praises me for innovation and perfectly cooked food.
I have had to live with these fears, because no matter what I do or where I go, they will be there waiting to unman me and make me quake in the face of my own perceptions, but they are only my perceptions of me, I have had to allow that others see me differently, even capable. I have to take each negative thought and shake it out and ask it what evidence it has of it's own right to exist in my head.
I have also had extensive therapy for trauma and quite a bit of work examining my complete lack of self worth. It is possible to live like this, but now and then I give in and ask for reassurance that I am doing OK. I still measure trips in how many cries it takes to drive somewhere, but that's ok ... that's my normal.