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Topic: A broken man normally held together by companionship

4 posts, 0 answered
  1. Frothin
    Frothin avatar
    1 posts
    7 September 2021
    From about the age of 18 I lost a lot of friends due to drinking and it broke me because a lot of other stuff was going on at the time but I made other friends along the way and being locked down and facing all that s*** again like I don't want to go to work I don't want to play games with mates all I want to do is drink cos I don't see it out and I never thought id think about it but I'm really thinking about ending it I know my family loves me but this is really hard I'm so over not being able to talk to anyone it's crushing me I leave work will the joking is and I'm having a fun day and I come home just too sit in my room do nothing my last two birthdays have been ruined I've just sat at home and drunk by myself 21st of the 22nd birthday should be celebrated when I'm thinking about is what does it matter no one cares
    1 person found this helpful
  2. Sophie_M
    Sophie_M avatar
    5712 posts
    7 September 2021 in reply to Frothin
    Dear Frothin,

    We’re so grateful to have you reach out to our community this morning and are so sorry to hear everything you have going on at the moment. Times like this can definitely get overwhelming . We hope that you find our forums to be a safe and supportive space to talk through your thoughts and feelings. Our community is here for you. 

    We hope you know that there is always help available to you, whether it's from our professional mental health counsellors Beyond Blue (available 24/7/365 on 1300 22 4636) or our friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) or the Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467).
    Keep checking back in with us whenever you feel up to it. 
     
  3. white knight
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • Awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    white knight avatar
    9174 posts
    8 September 2021 in reply to Frothin

    Hi, welcome

    From what you've written I can see, from an outsiders viewpoint, that you do lack a few things in your life that will make it more fulfilling.

    In these situations we can look at the common conventional activities that make us feel worthy and valued. The problem is at the moment depending on your location, is the lockdowns. That aside these are the things that are most comm0on in terms of occupying ourselves-

    • Hobbies 
    • Sports participating or barracking
    • Gardening
    • Computer games even internationally
    • Further education
    • Volunteer work to help others

    This topic is of interest to me because I had a problem when young. I was bored, boredom led to depression and that led to a downward spiral of which it seems, you are experiencing now. My remedy then was- model airplanes. I could fly them at a club so I mixed with others and I could build them at home in comfort.

    There is always negatives like the expense. Any sport costs money. Tennis, football, model airplanes or cars and so on all are pricey activities. I'm about to embark on building a model car racing track and that will cost $2000 just to set up then the ongoing costs.

    Anyhow, once you have some variety in life and keep active, you wont sit on your bed and brood, you'll be excited in going the next step on your hobby. It would be good to think about if you've ever had a passion and return to it. Or meet new friends. Unfortunately action is the answer and the more we dont take action the less chance of change. This falls in the area of positive thinking and motivation- both areas that I have huge amount of experience in. I'm 65yo now but when 26yo I went through similar to you, experiences of despair and lack of direction. I attended a motivational speech and it changed my life. You can read it here-

    https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/staying-well/30-minutes-can-change-your-life

    I hope that helps. Feel free to repost. 

    TonyWK

     

  4. geoff
    Life Member
    • Awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    15113 posts
    9 September 2021 in reply to Frothin

    Hello Frothin, and welcome to the site.

    It's easy for anybody to hide themselves in alcohol, accepting or rejecting any friendship that may come along but the situation may be different tomorrow when you're not drinking, trying to remember what actually happened the day before and could need prompts from other people telling you what was said.

    It's not easy for people to show that they care during the lockdowns, the world has changed in all aspects because of this virus and people are concerned about what may happen as well as having the vaccine.

    Tony has offered some great suggestions and if you decide to stay in your room drinking, that's your choice, but doing this will close any chance of connecting with other people, and this can be done in many different ways depending on what your state government has decided.

    Missing out on your 21st birthday is disappointing, but eventually, a 'catch-up' party can be achieved.

    Best wishes.

    Geoff.

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