I'd like to join with Sophie_M in welcoming you here, as usual she has given excellent advice,the Butterfly Foundation can be a very great help, they have the experience, and the understanding.
There were a couple of things you mentioned that I thought I might get your views about.
The first thing is the problem is always at the back of your mind, the second is you watch the very popular streaming shows, all of which have 'the beautiful people' in them, mainly becuse the advertisers say that sells better.
So what conclusions can you come to? Do you think watching a minute section of all humanity, all made up for the screen, is going to help or hinder your adverse views of yourself?
Secondly if you cast your mind back have you ever done anything that has made you forget yourself, even for a little while?
I guess you can see where I'm heading, but as I don't know your circumstances wonder if you might like talk about these things
I hope to hear from you again