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Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition (carers)

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Support following the bereavement of a family member, partner, spouse or someone close to you.

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by Bexie
5 days and 11 hours ago

Topic: Depressed due to isolation and civil liberty restrictions

  1. lunastone
    lunastone avatar
    124 posts
    25 September 2021 in reply to blondguy

    Hi, paul,

    ya, we are like our own country. The fact that domestic family can't even see each other for over 2 yrs is just sad. A year ago, we didn't have the vaccine but now have it and yet in the same situation. If i remember correctly, WA border was closed up until Dec last year. Then only opens on and off throughout this year. 5 months max?! Now completely shut to NSW and Vic. Not so much being a country anymore. If we are buying time to get the vax rate up, then be it. But i am not seeing that message getting across in WA. We are competing last in the vax rate with QLD. And you know the common thread between the two states. Hospitals still cannot cope without covid and we have like 20 months to get this right. We shouldn't have surplus at all. Big crowd events, AFL and the royal show. We are just waiting for another lockdown and should i say a punishment for those who don't want to participate this kind of 'free' lifestyle?

    Well, my feeling for covid varies with different perspectives. I was really scare/stress of it last year. But now, we have the vaccine, seeing hospitalisation rate dropping in high vax countries, i no longer scare. I know that it isn't a silver bullet but the protection rate is very good. My perspective is that everything in life has a risk. It is low risk enough if we have the vaccine. I'm worried about my close oversea family, who is in hospital for a treatment. Even though she is fully vaccinated, the risk of getting severe illness from covid is high under the circumstance. Hospital is stretched there so it becomes my worried factor. Another family member got tested positive (fully vaccinated). He wouldn't have known that if he wasn't tested through the work routine testing. He was told to go into isolation until a negative test. The rest of the household tested negative. If such case is recorded and reported, maybe we could see it in a different perspective that it might not be that scary once we are vaccinated?

    @hanna: i totally agree. There are groups of people who need to be protected. But at the moment, i feel that it has lost its balance for those who just want to move on with their life. I am not sure what more we could do other than vaxed and move on (i'm not supporting of a freedom day). We can't forever wait for those who don't want the vax.

    hope everyone has a nice weekend. i need to get out the house for a walk. xx

    2 people found this helpful
  2. Sleepy21
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    Sleepy21 avatar
    4104 posts
    25 September 2021 in reply to lunastone
    Hi all, how are u holding up? Rallies around Melbourne and a lot of noise about this stuff. I'm glad I can come here on bb and here on this thread to speak to and support and be around this nice community
    1 person found this helpful
  3. lunastone
    lunastone avatar
    124 posts
    30 September 2021 in reply to Sleepy21

    Hi, sleepy,

    thanks for asking. Well, nothing to look forward to. Just doom and gloom. I also have no idea what's going on in the last two months. Too many things in my mind. My old work place was messing my head. I wasn't polite when they indicated that they might want me back.....oh wait until their next few in line candidates said no for the job. You know, i have been grieving for the last 8 months about my career that i spent 10 yrs building up. They gave me hope of a come back and then took it away over and over again.....

    Just want my life back. 2 yrs of it being put on hold. I can't even think of when we could go and see oversea family again. Well, my friend is on the same boat even within australia. I can tell you. People are getting very depressed about it all. Just finished watching Norman Swan video. We will see the cost of lockdown in the years to come......diagnosis for cancer delayed. young kids with mental health issues etc....

    3 people found this helpful
  4. ecomama
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    ecomama avatar
    4542 posts
    2 October 2021 in reply to lunastone

    Hello all

    I wanted to touch base in light of our NSW Premier's resignation. What a blow to hear from my family that there appears to be corruption at foot there. Not surprising but I'm pretty dirty about a woman in power doing this, being just the same as others, I guess stuff will or won't come out about it!

    So around me lots of ppl are pretty much thumbing their noses at all the regulations.

    It's all nuts.

    Talk later, we're moving steel beams around in our garden now!

    Take care everyone!

    Love EMxxxx

    3 people found this helpful
  5. lunastone
    lunastone avatar
    124 posts
    3 October 2021 in reply to ecomama

    Hi, EM,

    what were you doing with the steel beams in the garden? Hope you got whater you needed to do with the garden done today.

    Ya, I heard about the resignation. I was never interested in politics until covid as it is directly affecting my life. I must say I might be the minority here. I came ot like Glady for her trial and error covid response. In fact, she is giving so much hope for people moving/looking forward than the gloom and doom that is feeding us here in WA. Now we have the vaccine, there is no excuse to hold us back. Nothing has been done other than shutting the border here in WA. We have plenty of supply so our dear leader has a lot to answer for with our lowest vax rate in the country. Yes, i don't want to open up when our vax rate is low but there is no encouragement to get rate up. In honestly, people have lost 2 yrs of our life. And time is critical for some elderly family members. Those life matter life. The last two days, i was just very angry with the fight back of our premier on re-opening. Threaten to shut NT, Tas out if they open to Vic and NSW. When do we become our own country?! My partner wants to take me out of town for a holiday as i have been so depressed and sad. I'm not keen. Upon checking, none of the accomodations are willing to give refund if there is a spontaneous lockdown. I understand that businesses dont want to lose money but i've to think twice as it is hard earned money. So yes, for now, i don't want to be here and it could come after i come back from the holiday. This makes me wonder who wants to go on holiday locally if that's the case? Now i understand why some local businesses and people want the border close to have that certainty. But we can't live like this forever. Look at Europe, life is normal as it is once the vax rate is high. So go and fix up the hospital than trumpeting our surplus.

    Anyway, yes, it is shocking to hear about the corruption charges. But i personally would give it a doubt until she is proven guilty. We shall see.....

  6. lunastone
    lunastone avatar
    124 posts
    3 October 2021
    @golden: are you still here ? Wave! @moon: i hope you are holding up in QLD. Sigh....when will we move forward? I miss my family so much. My siblings have gone home due to family emergency. Here i am, locked in WA. And yes, I'm vaxed. all my family are vaxed. happy to do quarantine. testing etc. The only thing i can't do is leaving for 3 months. Please...someone out there let us sign a petition to tell the govt that it is inhuman to separate family for this long. And we have done everything being told.
    2 people found this helpful
  7. Bananie1234
    Bananie1234 avatar
    67 posts
    3 October 2021 in reply to lunastone

    hi everyone,

    Looking at cases in victoria, it certainly is the true definition of why multiple lockdowns do not work. 1000+ cases with much tougher lockdowns than nsw. But i'm certainly enjoying the slight ease of restrictions in melbourne and i can't wait for lockdown to be over. I'm super glad that a surge in cases have not tightened restriction even more but the state government is really following the road map so i feel like there's light at the other end of the tunnel.

    i do however, don't know how i feel about the protests. I guess i see mandatory vaccination as part of the job. maybe cos i'm a healthcare professional, we always have to have up to date vaccination records and that list gets updated regularly. I guess we need to normalise this and just see this vaccine as any vaccination. it's like kids having to get mandatory vaccinations before going into childcare right? sometimes you need to prove certain things eg a police check for a job. But i also believe in pro-choice so i'm torn. However, if your job requires you to be in contact with vulnerable people i think it's fair to be asked to get it. in terms of tradies, i really don't know. i guess if they followed the covid rules at their workspace, maybe the government wouldnt have forced this upon them. we all had to follow covid rules at our workspace if it means not being able to use the tea room.

    I'm really upset with the protests. in the beginning i can resonate with them as we are all tired of lockdowns but now I just find it hard to accept it. I'm upset that some of these people are attacking healthcare workers who are just doing their job. They were spitting on them forcing the vaccination hub to be closed for a few days which then pushes back our date to re-open. I'm upset that these protests stopped our ambos from getting into the city when people's lives are at stake. I'm upset that these protests delayed deliveries of urgent life-saving medications to hospitals. As a healthcare worker, I can't accept this. you can protest all you want but don't disrupt other people's lives.

    i just don't know what to feel anymore.

  8. ecomama
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    ecomama avatar
    4542 posts
    3 October 2021 in reply to lunastone

    Hey luna, hi everyone else too,

    I hope you're all doing okay, doesn't seem so! Sending lots of loving energy to you all.

    Steel beams? lol just more junk left behind by demon (exH). I decided to use them to mark out an internal fence I intend to build for the proposed cabin's path and garden. BUT we moved the 2nd beam over and there was a massive Blue Tongued Lizard sitting there! What a darling. We raced to get our dog away. Then left the beams until we get more muscle to help, wow are they HEAVY!
    Always so much for me to do here. Now beginning the actual planning of the cabin build, I'll be even busier!

    Re: everything going on outside my 4 fences & immediate family...

    Worrying about all that is way WAY above my pay grade.

    The ONE consistent and persistent emotion I heard in all my recent conversations with anyone outside my family has been anger.
    I can't subscribe to it.
    I'm going low / no contact with all these ppl now.

    I've had a wonderful Counsellor for about 5y, she's helped me alot.

    Why worry and worry and worry endlessly over things well outside our control?
    As the Dalai Lama said (sic) "Worrying is like rocking in a rocking chair, you're doing something but it's not getting you anywhere"... I agree.

    Whatever my situation is right now, it just HELPS when I'm focussing on what I CAN do. Nothing else.
    It's possible to suffer from 'compassion fatigue' and I'm sure it's the same with endless stress & worry.

    My Fiance lives in the U.S.
    At the onset of this pandemic I had skyrocketing anxiety and was formally diagnosed with Complex PTSD from all sorts soon afterwards.
    I sought treatment, worked very hard and still work hard to hold on to any MH gains I've made.

    My aim is to be ONE of the people who are "okay" as we return back to work on site etc.

    Btw it's fine to be angry, it's a perfectly normal human emotion!
    I validate anyone's anger at the situation, the pandemic, their own situations.
    Though it can only last x long before anger does some hard core damage to us, not just mentally but it converts into physical illnesses too.
    If anger isn't motivating us to improve our lives and outcomes, it's pretty useless holding on to it IMO.

    Just not worth it.

    Take care everyone.
    Hope you can all find moments of peace, calm and beauty in your day!
    Love EMxxxx

    2 people found this helpful
  9. Weaponsofmassdisstortion
    Weaponsofmassdisstortion avatar
    46 posts
    17 October 2021 in reply to lunastone
    I feel like the first six months were an emergency, we had no idea what we were dealing with. But now it seems like we are just trying to placate people running around like headless chickens. I think the whole vaxx passports are an overreach. They say we will be out of lockdown by the end of the month, but I have my doubts. Remember when it was "2 weeks to flatten the curve" or remember the tracking app"if you want to get out and play download the app today", so yeah I really hope that this lockdown will end. But I have a feeling the government are just going to keep moving the goal posts. Anyway, I hope everyone is doing okay, and sorry for getting a bit too political.
    4 people found this helpful
  10. blondguy
    Life Member
    • Awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    blondguy avatar
    11208 posts
    17 October 2021 in reply to Weaponsofmassdisstortion

    Good point with the politics W

    Dont forget the last pandemic was in 1918...and they didnt have a vaccine

    and we dont have a manual on how do deal with this.....

    good on you for being a part of the forum family...I hear you loud and clear

    Paul

    3 people found this helpful
  11. Sleepy21
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    Sleepy21 avatar
    4104 posts
    18 October 2021 in reply to Weaponsofmassdisstortion

    Hi all,

    We have been let out of ld early, curious to see how others feel about this all.

    I wouldn't have even known, aside for a chatty a neighbour....which is always weird. To think you could wake up tomorrow and have a whole new set of rules, and if Ur a bit isolated like me, u wouldn't even know. I ask please if ppl disagree not to tell me off, I choose not to follow the news 5o stay sane, so sometimes I am a bit behind . Much care to all

    1 person found this helpful
  12. lunastone
    lunastone avatar
    124 posts
    19 October 2021 in reply to Bananie1234

    @benanie: wave. i wanted to reply but didn't get a chance. it will be a long post so will save it for another day as i should get some sleep.

    @W: everything is politic. Every state has its own rules. :( And i am getting very impatience with our dear WA premier who refuses to make a road map out. Goal post shifting all the time with a vague percentage of Vax rate. QLD just released the roadmap today. It seems pretty conservative but at least it is something. I hope peer pressure will get WA moving forward just a little. I don't even want to call it a leader. More like follower who just wait and see what others are doing.

    I personally would like a date because it is counter productive atm. He is protecting the people who don't want the vax and continue to punish the people who gets the vax and who just want to move on. There is no excuse of not getting the jab as we have plenty of stock now in WA. I am so angry....A local who i met told me that she wants the border close because she and her husband want to wait for novavax. They are 70+ so is high risk and yet they dont' want any mRNA or viral vector vaccine BUT novavax. First world problem hey. The dinner convo got heated up with another friend few days ago. She also wants the border close because life is good fly in and fly out for the job in mining. She is not yet vaccinated and doesn't want it. If covid gets into the mine site, then the operation would have to shut, it will affect the economy in WA. I explained to her that we are just delaying the inevitible. Plus, shut down is optional. It is the policy that prevents it to operate. We don't shut down a factory over a flu case, do we? That's why vaccination is important so no one gets super sick. Europe must have figured all these out?! I feel like sometime it is people own responsibility to take care of their own health. Now we have the vaccine that can prevent death, people don't want it (freedom of choice) then fine. Their own choice. Holding us all back just to protect the unvaxed is making me very angry. I wanted to cry the other day when i was on the phone with my family......2 yrs is a very long time. And it will go on longer with our premier who refuses to make any plan to rejoin the world. If anything, the mental toll on people is yrs to be paid.

  13. ecomama
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    ecomama avatar
    4542 posts
    19 October 2021 in reply to Sleepy21

    Hey Sleepy and a wave to everyone,

    It's sanity-saving not watching the News constantly, I support your decision 100%. In fact it's exactly what I did over a year ago. Keeping whatever MH gains I've made is my major goal.

    I agree with W, it's same same, no 'leaders' knowing what they're doing, so yes "headless chickens" indeed lol, great analogy.

    Aaaand the one constant in so many people is anger.

    Pure waste of my energy and I won't subscribe. Constant anger creates physical ill health, let alone eroding our well-being. Nup. Not doing it.

    Apparently we had our "Freedom day" - what a ridiculous term. You can feel the depression in the community, it's tangible.

    Our family is doing well. We keep our focus tight, within what we CAN do.

    Hope you can all create peaceful moments in your day,
    Love EMxxxx

  14. Bananie1234
    Bananie1234 avatar
    67 posts
    19 October 2021 in reply to lunastone

    Hi @lunastone,

    100% agree with you.
    i honestly don’t see why the rest of us need to suffer to protect those who refused to get vaccinated. It’s not like they’re looking out for us either. (Of course I’m putting those who can’t get it aside).
    i think it’s the end date that people want to see. Ever since Victoria announced the roadmap (with rough dates) i felt like there’s an end of the tunnel, i can see the light and now we can’t wait till Friday 😊

    Hope you are feeling better xx

    1 person found this helpful
  15. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3107 posts
    20 October 2021 in reply to Bananie1234

    Hi everyone

    All due respect to the opinions here but we have to protect the people who haven't yet been fully vaccinated but want to be - because obtaining vaccines was done too late by the govt and the vaccines take weeks to months in the case of astra zeneca between shots and people aren't sufficiently protected during this time. So part of the problem at the moment is that many people still haven't been sufficiently vaccinated. Also there's about a two week lag from 2nd shot to optimum immunity.

    And then we have to protect the hospital system because as the unvaccinated - and unfortunately a few fully vaccinated - people get sick they can overwhelm he hospitals.

    And yes I think people who don't get vaccinated when they should have to understand they run a very real risk of getting very seriously ill. They also pass on the virus more readily to others than people who have been vaccinated.

    I think it's just difficult for everyone. I'd hate to be making the decisions on public health issues these days it must be a tough gig!

    Things where I live now are starting to get a bit easier thankfully!

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