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Topic: Don't know how much longer I can put up with this

4 posts, 0 answered
  1. i'mbadwithnames
    i'mbadwithnames avatar
    25 posts
    6 September 2020

    Isolation was so much better than this.

    I moved in with my family at the beginning of this week when I got out of mandatory isolation and so far I've had to see my racist bigotted transphobic brother twice, my dad has called me a failure, ugly and stupid pretty much every day and keeps pressuring me like "what are your plans what are you doing" like, I got here 6 days ago, my stuff hasn't even arrived at the house yet, can you chill? I have just been in a house with abusive housmates for 2 years, and then spent half a year locked inside with them because of covid where the bullying escalated. I'm not ready, I have told him this, he laughed at me. I wore a mask to the shops and told me I looked like a *swear word* and laughed at me and basically bullied me for it. I'm just trying to feel comfortable and now I can't wear a mask anywhere because it makes me want to cry because of the things he said to me so now I have to be uncomfortable and unsafe. It's stupid.

    He is pressuring me to look for work when again, I literally just got here. Hell, I don't even have a windows computer to send my resume yet because again, my stuff isn't here yet.

    I am paying substantial rent, like not that much less than I was paying before, yet somehow my family can dictate what I have to do. I can't text while the TV is on, I can't stay in my room, I can't go out for lunch, I can't do anything. I feel trapped and I literally hate it here.

    I ran away from my family for a reason and the fact that lack of money is what brought me back is so crushing and my depression is perhaps worse than it has ever been. I'm lost and confused, and my family doesn't understand mental illness so they just think I am a lazy teenager and keep pushing and pushing and pushing and I'm already almost at my breaking point after literally 6 days.

    I'm sick of being bullied, talked down on and pushed around literally everywhere I go. I just want to run away and move cities/countries but I don't have money. Money is the bane of my freaking existance. My brother and my dad are the same, they say biggotted borderline masoganistic shit to me as a "joke" but it's not funny and it's really hurtful and already makes me feel worse about myself than I already do, which I didn't think was possible.

    I can't be here.....

  2. Sophie_M
    Sophie_M avatar
    3430 posts
    6 September 2020 in reply to i'mbadwithnames
    Hi i'mbadwithnames,

    We're so sorry to hear that it's been like this while you have been staying with your family. We undertstand that living with this kind of constant bullying and verbal abuse must be really distressing. Please know that you're not alone in this and there is some support available to you.

    Please do get in touch with the Coronavirus Mental Wellbeing Support Service for some support and advice. Our dedicated support line, staffed by mental health professionals, is available 24/7 on 1800 512 348.

    It might also be worth getting in contact with 1800RESPECT for advice. They offer 24/7 confidential information, counselling and support for people impacted by domestic or family violence and abuse. You can contact them on 1800 737 732 or visit  https://www.1800respect.org.au/

    Please feel free to reach out here on your thread to keep us updated on your journey. 
  3. Nurse Jenn
    Health professional
    • Health professional
    Nurse Jenn avatar
    427 posts
    8 September 2020

    Hi there i'mbadwithnames,

    This sounds so tough, and disruptive and uncomfortable. Readjusting to family can be a huge challenge for so many people. Especially when the circumstances are forced. Covid19 has caused a lot of people to be in situations they are not comfortable. What a hard time you are going through. Do you know when your things will be arriving? As SophieM mentioned, it is a great suggestion to keep writing here on the forum (if you feel comfortable) as just letting your feelings of frustration out can be really helpful. You are not alone.

    There is a thread on the forum about Coping with Coronavirus - see link. https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/staying-well/coping-during-the-coronavirus-outbreak

    You might find that you can make a post here and see if others have had some strategies to cope with having to live in situations that are stressful. It would be so difficult to having someone in your living space that make you feel bad about yourself and be disrespectful to you. Contacting 1800 RESPECT could really help in a hard moment. Please reach out to this service if you feel comfortable.

    One strategy that I can think of is to make a schedule of your time, so your family know what to expect from you in terms of job seeking and other activities. Sometimes when others know what you are doing generally, they might leave you to it. Hopefully once you get your things and computer, you might feel more at home. Please keep posting us to let us know how you are adjusting.

    We are listening.

    Sending you strength,

    Nurse Jenn

  4. Leigh1987
    Leigh1987 avatar
    22 posts
    8 September 2020 in reply to i'mbadwithnames
    I don't really have any advice or much to add except to say that sounds tough.

    I have struggled with housemates in the past too. It is hard living with people under the best of situations.

    This is why I live alone now. Maybe that's not a possibility for you atm because of your finances but perhaps it is something you can set as a goal in your mind. Something that can motivate you moving forward.

    As my Mother always says to me everyone needs something to look forward to...

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