I loved her terribly and now she has gone. When she was found, she had vomited. I don't know if she had a seizure, her heart failed or worse she ate a toadstool not knowing it was poisonous and she was throwing up to try to expel it.
I rang up a veterinary hospital today to ask to speak to a vet to see whether how she was found was common with any of the things I mentioned but got told by the receptionist "I'm sorry, but the vet does not answer customer enquiries." When I told her how she was found, the person said that it may be a sign of toxicity but without a postmortem we won't know, but we might not know even if one was done.
Dad would just like to have her cremated and brought home, hoping that I will try to find some closure but I can't. Every day when I get up and see her not here, it's heartbreaking. For 17 years we had such a close bond and now she has left me, how I don't know. If she was found resting in her kennel, it might be easier but not how she WAS found. I can't stop picturing it.
A special garden and memorial stone sounds nice and Dad was even thinking of putting a door on Kelli's kennel, painting it and raise it off the ground. Also getting her name put on the front.
I'd like her to take some things with her, things she loved like her coat that i bought her, her bed and maybe her DentaStiks that she loved so much. Dad suggested she should just take her coat with her and maybe the DentaStiks can go to my young sister's dog. I'd like her to take more than her coat.
When we had our last dog cremated, she took her bed that she was placed in, one of her coats and a few of her favourite toys.
I know that maybe in a few months I will be looking back at all the happy times I had with her but the way I feel now, I don't think I ever will. Whenever I got happy, something went wrong.
I want her back. :( :( :(