Sleepy, it does help. I try to say thank you and show appreciation to you and others here. I'm sorry if I don't at times. I do take all the advice given to me by professionals and non professionals. Just because I don't post about it, doesn't mean I don't take it. I've done literally everything I can, it's not my fault if people won't help up here. I can't even join groups, before COVID also, and I'm never given an explanation as to why. I do say it's discrimination but they don't seem to care.
I'm not in a position to move at the moment, and I'm worried if I did, that things could be worse or the same, and then it would take time adjusting, etc. Yes there's a possibility things could be better but it just seems like it's me. Everything I do and say is wrong. I often feel judged even on here like people think "oh she's annoying, what does she have to be depressed, etc about? She's so negative, all she does is whinge" amongst other things.
It does help, you didn't need to delete your comments. But everything is different for everyone. Believe me I've tried everything I can, on and offline.
I understand my GP may have been having a bad & busy day but that was no reason for him to be rude. I also said I was feeling triggered by the girls in the waiting room with their friends (which is no one's fault, I just get triggered because I have none) & he just shrugged his shoulders basically saying "who cares?". No other GPs in that clinic or other clinics around are taking new patients. I tried to see a different GP there who also deals with mental health but he's not taking new patients either.
I just felt so unwanted and unwelcome in that session. I thought I was supposed to go to a GP with mental and physical concerns and they were meant to help, not be rude? Every other time he's been fine & I've had no issue. I don't understand all of a sudden. I feel judged. I feel like I'm just a burden wasting his & my time, like I shouldn't go there because I don't belong. I feel like I don't deserve help & I'm not gonna get it.
He could've at least said "I'm sorry to hear that" about me being triggered, & could at least contact the place he referred me to himself & say "she has mental health issues & she's in pain, it's affecting her, can you please hurry up & see her, or give her an appointment at least?".
I know I'm not the only one struggling mentally & physically & I'm not trying to sound selfish, impatient, etc. I just give up.