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Topic: I never even met them (when mourning is invalidated)

2 posts, 0 answered
  1. Bulus Shabbaz
    Bulus Shabbaz avatar
    0 posts
    14 January 2020

    I was doing really well after coming down from about of mania...and then on the 10th, the music world was informed of the sad news that the legendary drummer Neil Peart from Canadian trio RUSH had died of brain cancer. This is not a post to promote RUSH so all I am going to say is this band had a very intense fanbase who were personally invested in their music and the lyrics to their songs, which Neil Peart for the majority, was responsible for writing. Suffice it to say, as a fan I was devastated and have been for the last few days.

    I am sure we've all had similar experiences when a musician or entertainer who's art means a great deal to you dies, and the feeling of loss and heartbreak can be for some, just as intense as it would be had a close friend or relative passed. And while the vast majority of people I know have never heard of RUSH could see I was visibly saddened, and have approached me with compassion, to some people, the idea of me mourning over a person who I do not know personally and have never met, puzzles them. These people seem to be insulted that I'd be so upset over the death of an entertainer. And as such, I've relegated to trying to hide my pain, or just telling people who ask me what is wrong, that a friend of mine has died, as not to run the risk of my emotions being invalidated.

  2. Lady Nova
    Lady Nova avatar
    15 posts
    14 January 2020 in reply to Bulus Shabbaz

    it always saddens when when a feeling, hard felt, is invalidated.

    How we react, feel, express is always valid. Loss is loss. How we feel it and process it is ours and ours alone.

    I guess you can choose to down play it and just say you a "bummed" about an artists death and that you felt they had a pivotal role in your youth experience? It isn't exactly how you feel, but it does allow an explanation of a somber, less engaged you?

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