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Topic: Irritable and very low self esteem

2 posts, 0 answered
  1. Alannah57
    Alannah57 avatar
    11 posts
    4 January 2020
    Hi, I returned from staying with family, and had a great time; but within hours of getting home I felt irritable, had low self esteem and I couldn’t stop a strong amount of negativity from being said. I think it’s a result of feeling sad and talentless, and talking to myself out loud is a way to prove that I’m not a pushover to other people. I don’t understand where this whole thing is coming from. Does anyone else relate, or have advice for those sad/grumpy feelings? I hope I can get to a more positive, constructive, focused and relaxed place in general life.
  2. therising
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    therising avatar
    1307 posts
    5 January 2020 in reply to Alannah57

    Hi Alannah57

    The challenges of re-turning can be pretty overwhelming. What I mean by this is we can go somewhere to reconnect with our natural self only to find we are re-turning to the self we do not wish to be, when we come home.

    Myself, I had this revelation after returning from my annual holiday to a natural wonder just outside of Lakes Entrance in Victoria last year. I love this place. I feel like I'm home there, amongst the trees, beside the lake, under the stars at night. It's where my natural or nature self loves to be. I take my kids, my mum and my self there and we all feel disappointed when we return to Melbourne after our week's stay at a beautiful retreat that resembles something from the 70's. I'm a 70's gal by the way.

    Last year, the return home really got to me leading me to feel quite low and even angry and I couldn't pick why at first. Then the 're-turning to my unnatural self' concept hit me. Was quite an epiphany. It was then that I decided to ask myself 'Who do I want to be, from this moment onward?' I want to be like a kid again, that's for sure. I want to adventure, I want to push myself to undertake challenges without thinking (with safety still being a factor), I want to express myself freely (without caring about what others think of me), I want to be more connected to nature and my natural self and the list goes on. That's who I wanted to be and that is who I am becoming. I don't pretend for a second this is an easy process. For a start, I find it difficult to stop thinking so much. It's a bad habit at times. For example, my 14yo son can say 'Let's go down to the beach this morning' which can lead me to think 'But I've got work this afternoon'. 'STOP THINKING WOMAN AND JUST DO IT' is the inspiration that pops into my head. I believe we have to allow our self to be inspired more often Alannah. Less of that thinking stuff. It really does get in the way. Yes, sometimes it is relevant though, in order to live a balanced life.

    If we want to get high on life, I believe we have to begin letting go of some of those thought processes that keep us down or safely grounded. Do we want to be grounded or do we want to get high? A flexible balance is good. Facing fears with the belief 'I can naturally overcome them if I just trust in myself and stop thinking so much' is a good mantra. This is what led me to kayak for the 1st on my holiday last year and this is what leads me to not care so much about what others think of me.

    Be brave :)

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