Hi Depressed mumma
I imagine you're doing an amazing job, under the circumstances. I have found 'under the circumstances' to be 3 significant words that can sometimes help shift perspective.
Having dealt with depression in the past, I can honestly say I did do an amazing job of coping, under the circumstances. Those circumstances involved some intensely challenging chemistry, the challenges of becoming a mum, environmental influences (including certain people) that did not lead me to hope in ways which would have made a significant difference. There was a long list of challenging influences, under the circumstances at that point in my life. I say, with great pride, that I made it through to fully understand how I did my best at that time.
Whether our circumstances involve depression, exhaustion, a lack of direction, a lack of hope from significant influences in our life, a lack of result (in finding a change to our mindset) and so on, these circumstances present incredible challenge. It is no simple challenge, like choosing which holiday destination to go to. The challenges can be immense. They can be challenges we're facing for the first time like managing a type of exhaustion we've never faced before.
This morning I spent some time in thought regarding the people who would be triggered by today's announcement. My heart goes out to all who are deeply triggered by such challenge. My daughter was one of them. She's making her way through VCE this year and felt deeply saddened by what she does not have to look forward to. No reconnecting with friends, no end of school celebration or excitement in this area of life (at the end of a long 13 years of schooling), no real sense of closure and so on. My thoughts were 'What can I do to raise her in this moment?' For a start, I encouraged her to vent to help her make sense of things. She could not have imagined these circumstances. None of us could have imagined the sorts of challenges we'd be coming to face.
I can definitely relate to missing the energy factor. I miss the emotion (energy in motion) that connects us to life. I miss the feeling of my body rising to excitement, through adventure. I miss how my body feels when I'm in a state of joy, traveling to one of my favourite destinations (a peaceful happiness). With my husband thoughtful in providing long relaxing massages, there is some sense of peaceful happiness with each careful touch. What, for you, would prove a sensational experience at this time?