Basically since early May, my sleep pattern has been out of whack. I am awake during the night till about 9am then sleep till about 5pm, and the cycle continues. I think this resulted from watching a scary movie late at night (which is not something I normally do as I don't like scary movies) and maybe the experience messed up my sleep pattern. Add to the fact I am on meds for paranoid schizophrenia and depression, and it's not a happy situation.
It is now July and I am still having irregular sleeping. Recently, I tried to keep awake till about 5pm as the plan is to sleep to about 6am and that will restart my sleep pattern. Hasn't happened yet but I'm working on it.
Recently as a result of bad sleeping cycles, I have been feeling very sad and teary for no reason. On the outside, I appear normal and well-adjusted but I guess my family/ home situation is unusual. I am a 32 year old single female who lives with my 70/71 year old parents and 30 year old autistic sister. I have no issues with mum, but my dad has been continually angry and irritable since 2013, for reasons I can't explain. Also my sister tends to be snappy (due to her condition) and she also likes to take it out on me, as if I'm to blame for her disability.
I know it's unusual for an adult to live with her parents, but I have no other relatives or friends or support where I can secure my own place, and also because I am family-less and friendless, I don't want to risk living on my own and being mentally sick, so I decide to stay with family - which I think is a common arrangement these days among people.
I think the cause of my sadness was in 2012, when my parents wanted to move into a city apartment, and because they don't allow pets, they rehomed our two cats. I was against it from the start, and insisted we stay living in a house so pets are allowed. But my parents were stubborn and had them rehomed anyway, saying "it's my problem" if I don't like it. Still, I think to this day, my parents secretly regret rehoming them, because it took out a significant part of the family.
I am not suicidal or overwhelmingly hopeless, but I am just upset over my irregular sleep pattern and sadness. I just feel less than human and like I don't deserve to be happy or live a normal life (as enforced by my always-angry dad).
I am considering taking anti-anxiety meds on top of my usual anti-psychotic meds and anti-depressants.