Im so sorry for the loss of your beautiful mum.
I understand it must be so hard, you sounded close.
I’m sorry your husband is downplaying your sadness.
He could be conditioned to think this way but it doesn’t mean he can’t challenge that and learn to be more receptive of what you are currently going through.
Please try to bring it up with him because he can’t work on his behaviour if he doesn’t understand it’s effecting you.
Sometimes old emotions can arise, things that we thought we have healed from but haven’t.
Please try to allow these emotions you can try to work through them to lead you to a place of healing.
Sometimes it’s helpful to do this with a professional.
Sometimes we do question what we want out of life and sometimes it takes a bit of searching from within to know what that is.
Be easy on yourself, all will be revealed in good time.