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Topic: In family house of mother who has passed

5 posts, 0 answered
  1. fred2018
    fred2018 avatar
    68 posts
    15 February 2020
    Love to hear from others who have lived or are living through the experience of being in a house with the memories of a passed loved one. I've been in the same house as where my mother passed and just expecting her to be here is difficult. I plan to move in a year from now.
  2. Guest_201
    blueVoices member
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Guest_201 avatar
    1294 posts
    15 February 2020 in reply to fred2018

    Hi fred2018, welcome to the forums.

    I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your Mother, my condolences.

    I've lost loved ones myself, so I know how you feel. I lost my Grandparents (Mum's Parents) in 2013 (my Nana) then 2015 (my Grandpa), my Dad's Parents passed away before I was born (I'm 20).

    Whilst I don't live in my Grandparents house, I've stayed there before and been there after they've passed, and I totally understand what you mean. I still feel like they're here too and I can see and call them, then reality sets in, it's sad.

    It's hard to move on I know, but there's no time limit on grieving. Maybe there will be some good memories in the childhood home, as sad as it will be for you. I wish I could give you a hug and help in person.

    Perhaps just try to look back and reminisce on all of the great times you shared with your Mother and as a family? I know it's heartbreaking knowing that you won't have memories like that again and you won't be able to recreate them, but sometimes it helps, for me anyway, just like telling myself there's no time limit on grieving. Or sometimes looking at stuff that reminds me of them.

    I can't even think about them some days let alone the house or anything that reminds me of them, it's just too triggering for me. But everyone's different and everyone has different coping mechanisms. I think you sound strong mentally and physically, because you joined these forums and made a post (good on you for that, that's an achievement and brave in itself) let alone moving into the childhood home.

    I hope things work out for you and you feel better. I'm sorry that I can't be of much help and give much advice but I hope it's somewhat helpful to you. I care and I'm here, I'll do my best to support you in any way I can on here and anywhere on the forums. I hope to see you around on the forums.

    Take care, good luck with the moving. If you'd like to chat I'm happy to, about anything.

    Best of luck with things, I hope things improve.

    Love and hugs, sorry I couldn't help much.

    Tayla x

    1 person found this helpful
  3. fred2018
    fred2018 avatar
    68 posts
    23 February 2020 in reply to Guest_201

    Thanks Tayla for the kind words, yeah I do have some nice memories to look back on aswell. Things will take time and yeah hopefully move in the year for some fresh memories aswell.

    Cheers

    1 person found this helpful
  4. Guest_201
    blueVoices member
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Guest_201 avatar
    1294 posts
    2 March 2020 in reply to fred2018

    You're welcome fred2018, I hope things get better for you. I know how hard it is.

    Sorry for just replying now, I stepped back from the forums for a bit.

    Take care.

    Tayla

  5. Sweesoft
    Sweesoft avatar
    5 posts
    9 March 2020
    It is never easy to cope with a loss especially if it is a mother who has passed. The memories will always remain but we will just think that she is in a better place now.

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