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Topic: Disliking In-laws???

4 posts, 0 answered
  1. Ijustneedhelp
    Ijustneedhelp avatar
    7 posts
    22 November 2021

    Ok,

    This is a serious issue I've been really struggling with for a long time.

    My wife's family are separated. Her Dads side of the family are awesome. No complaints. We get along and have is many things in common.

    Without sounding like a complete @***ole because I know this is a horrible thing to feel

    her mums side of the family I really struggle with because of their life choices and the way they treat people and my wife when we were dating at the time. We have had a discussion and she still wants to see her mums side but only sees her mum as a friend which I don't understand but I'm not gonna question it.

    My issue is, I feel like I can't stand them but I want to support my wife but my dumb temper/ego gets in the way. I feel like past history I can't help but paint any of their actions in a negative light. Are there any ways I can support my wife and this side of her family without showing I really dont like them???

  2. Sophia16
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    Sophia16 avatar
    169 posts
    22 November 2021 in reply to Ijustneedhelp

    Hey,

    I can see that you are feeling conflicted and helpless but what you are going through is completely normal. I hope you are feeling okay.

    Speaking to your wife about how you feel about your in-laws, is progress. Express how you truly feel.

    Showing support to your wife's side of the family is the difficult part, and it is hard to get through. I say, fake it till you make it. Be as nice as you can and set your biases aside. It will be hard at first but after a while, you will get used to it. It will also strengthen your and your wife's relationship.

    Please stay safe and i am here to chat if you need me.

    1 person found this helpful
  3. quirkywords
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • Awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    quirkywords avatar
    13027 posts
    22 November 2021 in reply to Ijustneedhelp

    Ijustneedhelp

    thanks for your post and sharing your story.

    I think it is hard sometimes to get on with in laws and partner's cousins but when the in laws have separated it can be tricky.

    Is it possible to tell your wife you respect her wanting to see her mums side of the family but you would find it awkward to see them and explain why.

    I think if you can talk to each and really listen and maybe come to a compromise.

    just a suggestion that may not be helpful.

  4. Ijustneedhelp
    Ijustneedhelp avatar
    7 posts
    22 November 2021 in reply to Sophia16

    You're right. Thankyou. I will try my hardest.

    1 person found this helpful

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