Topic: Parent going to a nursing home against his will

Hello, I am struggling with the fact that my Dad needs to go into a nursing home. He flat out refuses to go and is in denial that he needs to be there.

How do I deal with this I have so much guilt and emotions about this?

For a bit more context I am currently caring for my Mother full time, work full time and am engaged. My sister is helping but tends to get things in more of a mess that anything else and cant deal with the legal nor emotional side of things, we have recently had a SACAT approved for Dad and this has all happened only recently and I am feeling very overwhelmed.

My father was not a good father nor a good husband and has only been back in my life for the past 4-5 years. He has Dementia, I don't understand the extent of this but he repeats and ruminates on his past a lot. He can not be in his home as he is not looking after himself properly and I can't do more than I already am. He is currently in the hospital and they are saying he needs a nursing home but are not supporting me in this and I am finding it hard to navigate this aged care system and all the things I need to do.

Can anyone offer any advise on their experience in this area.

Thanks

Hi PrincessSel

welcome, and thanks for sharing. Im sure there are a lot of people that can relate.

my grandparents were both placed in care for their dementia (about 5 years apart). My grandfather was the first to go downhill, and refused to go into care. He was very cunning, escaping a few times.

Talking to my mum, who did most of the care organising, it was difficult for her. There were family disagreements too among the siblings about the care, and she didnt get a lot of assistance from them. But mum knew what was best. Nobody could look after them both, and gran certainly couldn't look after pa. it really came down to their safety.

once they were in the nursing home it took a while to adjust, but mum was there just about every day.

If you know of a facility that he may go to, maybe see if the staff can assist you in what to do. I know that one of the head nurses at the home had a lot of knowledge about it all, and was a lot of help to mum.

Not_Batman

Hi, welcome

We are presently going through the aged care system for my MIL. But she has all her wits about her.

My understanding is that a GP can instigate force to be used to move your dad into aged care along with any other approvals through assessments in the normal course of events.

I'd make an appointment with your GP.

TonyWK