Topic: struggling with special needs children

Hi Mark,

How awful! So frightening and very unsettling.

After you had very little sleep the night before, and then last night being disturbed with nightmares, I imagine you’ll feel very tired today. Hope you get some catch up rest.

lillylane

I was thinking of going into town this morning.I am just tired and just did some washing by hand can't wait for my new washing machine to get here.

Hi Mark,

That sounds a bit unsettling for you! How are the kids about it?

Fire is such a powerful force, it really gets us in our survival mode, I think.

Last years fires certainly brought this whole area to a state of emergency for quite a long time. Also a great community building exprerience I think, although I can't speak for the ppl who lost their homes and are still having to deal with the consequences. Our homes become our security, it's awful to imagine losing them so quickly like that, in a fire or flood or other catastrophic event.

Good day to stay home and look after yourself, for sure.

Hugs,

J*

Hi Jstar my kids seem to be ok about it at the moment.I will keep an eye on them.My son gets scared of things easily.I went into town for a couple of hours and now just going to rest in front of the tv for the rest of the day.I just feel for the people who lost everything.At least no one was hurt.
Take care,
Mark.

Newbie here!

Couldn’t move past this post. Parent to a 10yr old with a disability and have A lot going on mentally myself. It’s a tough gig!

Hi Candypants and welcome.Yes it is tough raising a child with a dissability plus having your own mental health problems.I hope you can find this thread helpful and know you are not alone.I hope you feel comfortable and sharing more of your story on here.
Take care,
Mark.

I am getting anxious it's my daughter's birthday Friday and wondering where she will be this time next year.I probably will be supporting her financially and still caring for her.18 years old dosnt mean she is off my hands probably more looking after by me as I won't have the break with school.The government don't care and dosnt seem to be much support.

Hi Mark,

Sounds like there is a lot to consider at this age and the uncertainly would be stressful. Does your daughter have any thoughts on what she wants to do next year?

I’m at the start of the schooling journey (my daughters have just started prep).

Hope you are going ok.

Lillylane

Hi Lillylane the school juorney can be difficult at times I hope you have a really supportive school.My daughter has interest in working with animals but don't know if she will ever be able to do that with the way her aniety is and having constant panic attacks.I don't think their is any support for her once she has left school.The support systems will be taken away.I don't want her life to be like mine,no friends and no one wants me in their life.

Hi Mark,

I can understand the anxiety you are feeling. Especially if it seems like your daughter is finding school life hard, you worry about the rest of life.

But really, isn't school kinda the WORST part of life?

I wonder, if she likes working with animals, maybe there are opportunities she can explore this year that will provide something to look forward to continueing with in her life. Perhaps even stepping stones to work/volunteering. I guess now is the time to begin to access it, with the support systems you already have in place.

I just googled wires, and they have a volunteer pathway, which begins with a course. You need to be over 18 to do it. Maybe it's something you would like to do Mark? Not sure if you feel up to it, but it could be a way to get your D more involved in caring for animals.

This is a challenging time, and it's good that you're thinking about her future. By focusing on the postive qualities your d has it will be easier to have conversations about what she'd like to do in life.

Good luck with that tho, I can remember some very painful convos with my d about 'the future' !!!

Maybe she would benefit from some careers counselling?

Just try not to stress Mark. Enjoy her birthday as much now as you would have when she was 4. Altho I'm sure there were worries then as well! Every age has it's own uniques worries- thats how we accumulate grey hairs!

Cheers,

J*

Hi Jstar tha ks for your caring comments they mean a lot to me.For my self my physical and mental health aren't great.Been so tired and been trying to have sleeps during the day.It is a completely different world that imagined for my daughter 17 years ago.She did manage to do work experience with a vet and at the zoo a couple of years ago and was suppose to do it again last year but of cause that got all cancelled and this year the seniors don't do it.Try and get her to the end of the year and see what happens.
My son sees the specialist on Friday and I think she will change his medication as he keeps losing weight on the one he is on.
Take care,
Mark.

I have just been told that my sons class will be changing next week it will be a 4-5 class and it will have a new male teacher.My son has never had a male teacher before.I am starting to have a panic attack with these new changes.Everything always goes pear shaped when these changes happen and have to start from the beginning.

Hi Mark,

all the best for next week. Try to not anticipate trouble. Change is difficult but it can be good too.
hope the new teacher is AMAZING!

cheers

J*

hi Mark - i also don't like changes and get upset when something good changes... i can understand the fear. Hoping the male teacher is amazing, like J kindly said.

It is a bit of a change but i truly hope it's okay for ur son. I hope he is okay with all the changes and that you are also doing well.

Hi sleepy these changes happen every year they always change his class and teacher and it always unsettles him.The new teacher was at the school last week but haven't met him yet.My son seems to be so tired after being taken off one of his medications.So see how he goes tomorrow .I will let you know.
Take care,
Mark

I am having a bad day and it just got worst as I got a long text from my son's principle.He is not coping at all with the classroom changes and even hit another student.After having a great start to the year I am now going to chop abuse from another parent.It was all good to the doctor decided to take him cold turkey with all the changes at the school.I suspected this would happen.

Hi Mark,

Wow that really sucks. I can understand how that would put a downer on your day. I really feel it personally when my child does the wrong thing, it's hard not to.

That being said, please don't take it personally!

Your son is going to need you to stay level headed and cope with this, especially if he's not.

It sounds like you feel like youre at the mercy of whatever the Dr decides. That must be very disempowering.

Hope you get thru the day without too much damage. Let us know how you go dealing with the fallout.

Big hugs,

J*

Hi the specialist phone appointment was cancelled and no new appointment only the one in her office in two weeks.The school gave us a letter for her which was interesting reading.The school said he was a little bit better yesterday but couldn't focus.So I probably won't get any new treatments if any for another two weeks.

Hi Mark,

Bummer about the appt being canx. Does that mean the meds stay the same as last week?

This must be exhausting for you.

I hope things improve Mark,

Take care

J*

Hi Jstar it just means their is no change to medication which she never will do over the phone anyway.She wants to see how he goes for a couple of weeks of that one she took him off but I don't think she will put him back on that one.I just don't want to go back to the days of picking him up early every day.

Hi Mark,

So how did your son go today?

Any stories to relate?

I can understand the Doc wanting to check out the changes before making any more.

Hope it's going ok, and that you had a good weekend.

Really hot here today.

Cheers,

J*

Hi Jstar I am not sure how my son went today.No one said anything so must have been good.The kids are with their mother at the moment as I am going into hospital tomorrow for surgery.I have been told 6 weeks recovery.I have been very anxious about it.

Tale care,

Mark.

Hi Mark,

Hey I'm sorry to hear about your surgery. I can understand you feeling anxious. I hate hospitals completely. And then there's the recovery!

I really hope your family and community can support you during your recovery. Maybe it will be a nice surprise!

I wish we were real neighbours! There's always too much food in my fridge.....

Take care,

Big hug,

J*

Hi Mark

Hope you’re doing ok. It can be difficult in recovery and also a challenge with mental health when physical movement is restricted.

Lillylane

Hi Lillylane thanks for your words.It is a physical and mental struggle for me at the moment.I have been spending most of my time in bed watching DVDs which gets a bit boring.A long road to recovery but slowly improving.

We had Autism Australia visit my son's school and had a meeting for one hour.Unfortunately on couldn't make it due to my surgery.Whst came out of that meeting was for the school to start using visual aids again and write down his moods through the day as well at home.The teacher says my son has been struggling with concentration since being taken of the morning medication.We have an appointment with the specialist Wendesday and see what she suggest.Also they are going to look into his toileting as the rewards chart does not seem to be working and see what other suggestions they come up with.

My son had a reasonable week last week.He does have trouble with concertrating and tiredness.He came over Saturday and just wanted to sleep.I wish I could have gone to the meeting with Autism Australia I had a few things I would have liked to discuss with them but due to my surgery I couldn't make it.I couldn't go to the meeting last year due to covid restrictions.
My daughter just struggle with everyday task.She struggled to sweep the floor for me and clean as I am still struggling after surgery .She did get the second highest marks in her biology exam at school.

Hi mark

i hope ur daughter's amazing abilities to achieve academic success will help her out

that's pretty brillaint of her

that mustbe hard to be recovering at the moment. are u okay? i know that is frustrating when u are the only adult around.... so much to do around the house

Hi sleepy I didn't have real good day today.I had a nap at lunch time and woke up in a bit of pain and I took something for it and it seems to have settled down a bit now.
My daughter gets straight A's usually in school but doing the everyday task around the house seems to be a struggle for her.I am getting nervous for her what she will be doing this time next year when her school days are but a memory.
Thanks for caring sleepy
Take care,
Mark.

Hi Mark,

It must be challenging recovering from your op... maybe it’s a good chance for your d to practice her housework skills.
Du think it’s just not being used to doing it which is making it hard? Sometimes my kids make things look really difficult when they don’t want to do it. And if she’s really smart then maybe she concentrates on that side of things rather than the physical coordination tasks.
Good on her btw! Great effort!

sad to hear you’re doing it tough atm- my thoughts are with you.
hugs

J*