Good Morning LQ23
I am so very happy you have opened up and shared your story, you will never be judged here and we are here to support you and give you comfort...
Ok so you have your meeting this morning and I can hear how terrified and nervous and scared you are and that is totally understandable. You old boss sounds like an wonderful person in that he reached out to your husband and that he cares and wants to support you. I hear you are so very overwhelmed and anxious about this meeting today and I want to send you all my strength.
My words for you today would be to open up to your ex boss as you have to me here, he sounds very supportive and the fact that you have been secretly trying to pay the money back shows that you are very remorseful for your actions and this is a very good start. I think perhaps explaining to him why you felt you needed to steal the money might help give him some insight as to it may have been a desperate time for you and that this is most certainly not your "normal" behaviour.
I can hear how sorry and regretful you are about what you have done and I am so proud of you for speaking up, for talking to your husband and now agreeing to this meeting, that is so very brave and very strong and you are doing everything to make the wrong right again.
Please try to be kind to yourself, we all make mistakes in life and it is not a summary of who we are as people. You have made a mistake and now you are doing your very best to correct it, well done, you could have just run away and swept it under the carpet, so every credit to you for showing integrity and making it right.
Try to take some deep breaths, but I think just let it out to your ex boss who seems very understanding.
I would really like to hear how this morning goes for you LQ23.
Big hugs to you and well done
AS