Hi everyone, I am new here so I am a bit nervous to be
opening up. Before I start I just wanted to say I hope u are all well. I guess
I should tell u a little about myself.
3 or 4 years ago I went to headspace for the first time. I had
been struggling long before then but I had only just got the courage to ask my
parents if I could go to therapy. I started to go pretty regularly and I was
comfortable with my therapist. However, about 12 months afterwards I stopped
going. This was a result of circumstances (my therapist decided to start their
own practice, it was getting expensive).
During my time with headspace, my therapist conducted some
assessments which indicated that I had anxiety and OCD. However, they were a
strong believer in not labelling things so I never got a diagnosis. This has
made life very difficult. I feel as though I cannot say I have OCD or anxiety
as I am not officially diagnosed. I feel like a fraud and do not want to
Since my time at headspace I have not gone back to therapy.
I have fallen into this space where I once again am too scared to start the
process to go back to therapy. And life since then has been one of ups and downs.
I have had some good times but I have also had some really bad times. And now I
find myself in a really bad mindset. With nobody to contact for support. This
is perhaps the lowest I have ever felt in my life.
I know I need help. I have seen what can happen when
something is left too long. But the problem is I can’t wait 6-8 weeks to get into
headspace, I need help now. I want to get an official diagnosis so I can begin
to embrace recovery. I want to be able to sleep at night without my brain filling
with intrusive thoughts. I want support so that I can continue working through
what is going on.
Recently I have had a regular intrusive thought which is
rather scary for me. It is what I guess u could call the last nail in the
coffin. It signals to me that I need help now. That this can’t continue.
Anyway I will stop there as I am sure I am boring u by
talking about myself. I hope u all have a good day.