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Topic: I failed a test and I feel like a failure

5 posts, 0 answered
  1. janine is happy
    janine is happy avatar
    3 posts
    11 August 2021

    Today, I got my math test which I did miserably. My classmates got better marks than me and I felt jealous. Even my sister got better marks.

    I then went home and told my parents and they got really mad at me, saying that I would be homeless in my future. I’m currently really sad and have negative thoughts. How do I cope?

  2. Sophie_M
    Sophie_M avatar
    5687 posts
    11 August 2021 in reply to janine is happy
    Hi janine is happy,

    We are so sorry to hear about your math test and that you are feeling sad and having negative thoughts. We understand that this must be so hard for you right now, especially hearing such hurtful comments from your parents. Please know that you never have to go through this alone, and support is always here for you.

    If you would like to talk to someone we would recommend that you get in contact with the Beyond Blue Support Service. They are available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 1pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport  One of our friendly counsellors will be able to talk through these feelings with you and can offer support, advice and referrals.

    If you are interested, we would also recommend getting in touch with Kids Help Line. They are a confidential and anonymous, telephone and online counselling service specifically for young people aged 25 and under.

    Please feel free to keep reaching out here on your thread whenever you feel up to it.
  3. Croix
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • Awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    Croix avatar
    10210 posts
    11 August 2021 in reply to janine is happy

    Dear Janine is happy~

    I think if somebody put you down then you feel bad, and in this case it is your parents. Parents are supposed to love you and keep you secure, not say horrible things like you'll end up homeless.

    That's not on, how can you feel secure with that over your head. Why do you think they got mad and said that?

    With the maths, are you always struggling with it or is this a new thing? I know you were larking about medication, do you mind if I ask if are you under medical support, and might that be a reason?

    Sophie_M has some fine suggestions, the Kids Help Line has good people and understand a lot. You could talk with them -or even web-chat if you do not want to talk.

    https://kidshelpline.com.au/get-help/webchat-counselling

    You may also have the friends you went shopping with, is any one of them the sort you could talk with and they would care? Even just hanging out with them might be good

    I'm sorta guessing some of this stuff, would you like to come back and talk more abut the hassles you have or even about some of the things you like.?

    Croix

  4. jaz28
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    jaz28 avatar
    122 posts
    12 August 2021 in reply to janine is happy

    Hi there,

    I am sorry you are experiencing hardship with your schoolwork. It is only natural to feel jealous, we are all guilty of it.

    That is not very nice of your parents to say, I am sure they want you to succeed, but that is not very supportive. I would suggest calling the helplines the other commenters have suggested if this is really upsetting you.

    One bad test is one bad test. I used to be horrible at Maths at school, I just do not have the brain for it. I failed a lot of tests, but I persevered and managed to pass the important ones and I am now doing my dream course at Uni. Which only involves one kind of maths - statistics - which I am better at. So what I am saying is - nobody's perfect, we all make mistakes, and we all get bad marks at some point. It does not define you. School is important, stay in school and work hard as you can. But focus on what you love. Do what makes you happy and remember that one bad test doesn't define you. You have so many more tests and experiences to happen in your life, and you can only learn from this mark and improve it. Who knows - you may not even need Maths in the future!

    I'm sorry your parents were not supportive about this. Please talk to someone you know will be supportive (like a friend or teacher), or call the helplines listed if you need to.

    Stay happy,

    Jas.

  5. Sophia16
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    Sophia16 avatar
    112 posts
    13 August 2021 in reply to janine is happy

    Hi Janine,

    I'm really sorry about what your parents said. I'm sure they said it out of anger but that does not make it right. A math test does not determine your future career.

    One thing I learnt in school and I still use it today is 'Your marks do not define you!'

    You may have got a really bad mark on your maths test but that doesn't mean you are bad at maths in general and it doesn't make you dumb. It is all an experience. If you didn't do as well as you like, then for the next test you can improve.

    You know you did not do as well as you wanted in this maths test and because of that, you're going to do amazing on future tests.

    If you want any study strategies, let me know!

    Hope this helps.

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