In high school my friend group didn't really like me, and I don't know why. They were mean and hardly ever invited me to hang out and such. I struggled a lot with mental health issues in high school so it really hit my self-esteem badly.
I'm now 22 years old. I thought I had a new friendship group and I didn't have to worry about pathetic high school drama anymore. I have a university degree and I'm currently in the middle of my second one, so I figured I'd involve myself around more mature people.
And my friendship group has been good for the past 3-4 years, however, over the past month I've noticed it's changed a bit. It started when I fell out of a close friendship with a girl I had known since around year 9. Lately she has been very self-absorbed and doesn't really bring much to our friendship anymore so we have slowly been drifting away. It hurts, absolutely, but she was very toxic. Still, I don't hate her or anything and if she was with us when hanging out with our other friends I wouldn't care at all. My other friends seem to be a lot closer with her now, and all of a sudden they've been going out doing things together that we all would usually do. I feel as though the friend I've drifted away from is almost like the 'ring leader'. I hate putting it like that, but it's almost like if she doesn't like someone or doesn't like doing something then all her friends can't like that person or can't do that thing.
I had plans to have dinner and see a movie with one of the other girls the other week but she said she was sick and couldn't go anymore (she told me this the night before our plans), and yet the next day she was out in town with the other friends going to lunch and hanging out. One of them was even sending me snapchats of them all hanging out?? I sent one of the girls a message asking if I have done anything wrong and now she's just ignoring me because she's been active on every other platform apart from facebook. I've come to realise that when we did all hang out, I'd only be invited if I organised something. I just feel really lonely, like I'm almost 23 years old and going through this stupid high school stuff again. I'm not good at making friends, and I really have no one now apart from my boyfriend. I've been friends with one of the other girls for 2 years, the other 5 years, and I feel like they really just don't even care about me or our friendship. I'm finding this is taking a toll on my mental health.